Playing By Her Own Rules
Style matriarch Yvonne Tozzi swims in a sparkly ‘mermaid’ dress to delight her grandkids, loves a water fight and says she is proud of living life on her terms.
“I pretend to be a mermaid for my four grandkids. I put on the dress and fool around.”
If you’re Yvonne Tozzi there’s no cloak of invisibility that happens just because you’ve gotten older. You can’t be invisible when you stand six-feet tall, with waist-length blonde hair. But it’s not just how she looks. You can sense her power even before she opens her mouth, and when she does open her mouth, the force of her words, the directness and the sheer confidence lets you know immediately: this is not a woman to be messed with.
Take a listen to how she summarises her biography in a single sentence: “I’m going to be 64 this year – I’ve modelled, opened restaurants, had kids, got cancer.” Of course, there is more than that. It turns out that Tozzi was born in Parkes, NSW, to Dutch parents and all four girls in her family were model material, so much so that her eldest sister was scouted. Yvonne wasn’t convinced she would follow in her footsteps – her father implored her to get a higher education degree first – and so she studied fashion design for a couple of years until the London modelling world beckoned.
“It was amazing. It was the time of punk and the New Romantics – the early ’80s – and I was in the thick of it. I had come from Cronulla – I was tall and with my long blonde hair I was very unusual. I remember going down to Kings Road and seeing everyone with purple hair and safety pins and feeling like they were on a different planet.”
At 19, she modelled in London, Paris and Milan; by the time she was 22, she landed on a beach in Thailand where she met an Italian man – Nicola Tozzi – and decided to marry him. She was 29 when they tied the knot.
“Back in the ’70s, they used to have these paper suits which were made of parachute [material], basically like hazmat suits. I’d love wearing them with a belt and different pieces, but I’ve toned that look down now that I’m older, and love this white jumpsuit. I roll up the sleeves and the bottoms, and put a scarf around it. You can dress it up or down; it’s a go-to piece when I think, ‘oh fuck, what have I got to wear?’ I like wearing crosses. I’m not religious – I’m a total atheist – but I find there is something very beautiful about crosses, whether it’s with shells or wood or whatever. I bought this cross at Island Luxe in Byron Bay.”
“I love my velvet lounge suit. I’ll put it on when I have friends over. I have two Afghan hounds; I had an Afghan when I was 17 and when I had my brain tumour, my daughter Cheyenne said, ‘I’m going to get you a dog.’”
“Sometimes I go over the top with rings and lots of ornaments. Some, like the G-string [worn on opening page], belongs to my daughter … she wears it over her bikini.”
“I want to be noticed, and I also want comfort. You can’t help stand out when you’re six-feet tall and have hair down to your waist. I don’t slouch.”
A glamorous life unfolded; her two daughters, Cheyenne and Tahyna were born, and at first the Tozzis made their living by selling boardshorts at Paddington market. But Nicola, who adored coffee but noted it was difficult to get a good espresso in Sydney, realised there was a gap in the caffeine market, and opened Caffe Roma. With its 24-hour licence, it soon became a hot spot, partly through Yvonne’s ingenuity: looking at the cafe’s blank walls, she went to a modelling agency she knew and collected its model cards and used them to decorate the space. When models heard this was happening, they came into the cafe to see if they had made it onto the wall … “and that brought the boys!” laughs Yvonne. Soon, a glamorous crowd frequented Caffe Roma. “We had the Rolling Stones, David Bowie, Kiss, INXS … they would come there after they finished performing and eat and drink until the early hours of the morning.”
The couple’s next venture was a nightclub in Kings Cross, but that proved to be the death knell for their marriage: “My husband started having affairs, and I said fuck off, and I was out of there!” Yvonne soon found her own line of work – for three years, she held the position of fashion editor at Family Circle – but her life took an unexpected turn when she was diagnosed with bowel cancer in 2003. She fought that, but in 2015 found out that she had benign brain tumours. “I have three that are just ticking along,” she says.
““I’m not frightened of death at all … I’m more scared of not living than dying.” ”
It’s given her an unusual outlook on life. “I’m seriously scared of not living. I want to live, make memories, be with family friends, love however long it may be. Que sera, sera.”
But if her health takes a turn for the worse, she’s prepared – at least mentally. “I’m not frightened of death at all … I’m more scared of not living than dying. But if I get diagnosed with whatever, I want to euthanise; I want that in my own hands. I’m very pragmatic”
But she doesn’t plan on choosing that road anytime soon. “I have no insecurities about getting older – I’m happy to still be here, I don’t care. I haven’t had any work done. I’m happy that I can still enjoy moments with my family. I’m making memories. And if that means wearing a gold dress in the pool and having water fights, that’s good. It’s all fun.”
